Puh-leeze!

I get redd a lot of shidduchim at work. None have gone anywhere, but it's nice to be thought of just the same. So when a nice frum lady, who I'm pretty friendly with, asked me how old I am, I thought she had something in mind, and told her my age.

Big mistake.

Her response was: "Nu?"

As they say in Timbuktu, Puh-leeze!

Batteries

Tonight, as I was putting my little brothers to sleep, one little brother wanted to use the other's CD player. Of course, younger brother didn't want to let. In an attempt to get him to allow it, I told him that if the batteries run out, we'll get him new ones. His response? "I don't want new ones. I like these batteries."

I was thinking about his comment later on. It applies nicely to shidduchim.

We are not supposed to daven for a specific boy (or girl), but rather, for the right one for us. We may like these batteries, but if they're dead, they won't be of much use to us.

Broken Engagements

There's a phenomenon that's unfortunately become much more common recently in the frum world. Broken engagements.

How many girls do I know that got engaged, only to break it shortly after, and some, right before the wedding?

Why is this happening?

I have a theory. Feel free to disagree.

I think that girls are scared to say no. If they say no to this one, who's to say there will be another one after this? Look at all the older singles! We're in middle of a major Shidduch CRISIS. Maybe, if we take away the pressure, girls can relax and feel secure that he will come at the right time.

Old Age

An old lady looks out her window.
The world has passed her by.
The little infants, adorable toddlers,
Now adults, with busy lives.

Although I'm yet young,
Still very few in years,
Why do I sometimes feel like that old lady,
Holding back my tears?

As I watch the young girls,
Whose "big sister" in high school I was,
Get engaged to those very boys,
On whose list I was.

Light!

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. It's the light of an oncoming train.
-A harried mother juggling three sick kids

Shidduch Resume

What a great idea!
A Shidduch resume!
Put all info on one page,
It's much easier that way.

But wait - what's this?
You don't like what I wrote?
Change this word? Delete this line?
I've totally missed the boat?

Shadchan #1 says:
"That makes you look too frum."
Shadchan #2:
"That makes you sound so krum!"

Then comes Shadchantes,
Numbered 3 and 4,
"Change that phrase!
Are you looking for a bore?"

So I make all the changes,
And send it again,
Hope against hope,
But what happens then?

Shadchan #5
Comes running along,
And tells me to sing
A whole different song.

Right behind him,
Is Shadchan #6,
Who tells me to play,
Some brand new tricks.

What should I do?
Where shall I turn?
Without a resume,
I'm finished, I'm burned.

I'll just have to rely,
On the One Above,
Who has all of my info,
And I can always count on His love.

The Leaf

I thought I was strong.
A leaf attached firmly to the tree.
I knew where I was.
Exactly where I wanted to be.
But then...the wind blew.
Does it take so little to sway me?

Does it really matter?

White shirt, black hat,
Black suit and a tie,
Is the description
Of a Yeshivish guy.

Striped shirt or colored,
Knitted kippah on his head,
Tan pants or jeans,
Now he's modern instead.

Yeshivish, modernish,
Knitted kippah, black hatter,
Can you tell me one thing-
Does this really matter?

A Bais Yaakov uniform,
Tights that are black,
Buttoned up to her neck,
That's a girl that's geshmak.

Wearing a denim skirt,
Short socks that reveal,
Her collarbone showing,
A much more modern appeal.

Bais Yaakov, more modern,
Skinnier, or fatter,
Can you tell me one thing-
Does this really matter?

Why do we judge
From the outer appearance?
Why does this rate
Our approval or leerings?

Why are we divided
Into so many factions?
How soon will we decide
That unity is in fashion?

A Little Sensitivity

My seven-year-old brother told me that he said the following in Shma Koleinu today:

"Hashem, you know where my sister's chosson is. Can you please just send him to us?"

May his Tefillos be accepted.